Thursday, June 28, 2012

Top 10 Things I've Learned About You

Writing a blog can be a strange experience. We bloggers share our intimate thoughts with our keyboards and computer screens, sending our words into the electronic void, uncertain who, if anyone, will read them. My posts seldom elicit comments, so after a while, I lapse into a false sense of security, believing I'm typing to myself, until I'm shaken from my reverie whenever a reader posts a comment or approaches me in person and says they've read my blog. "So you're the one," I usually reply, wondering who else might be out there perusing my missives.

Some of my followers are visible despite their silence, having subscribed to my blog through, Networked Blogs, Facebook, Goodreads, Twitter, Amazon, or Shelfari. But some read it namelessly through an RSS feed or land on it through a Google search and bookmark the blog to return anonymously. However, thanks to Google Analytics, I can see what terms they've searched for that brought them to my blog, and try to form a composite profile of you, my readers. So without further adieu, here are this month's top search terms [and why I think they showed up]. Really, I'm not making this up. Drum roll, please.

10. "halos and horns"  [title of my fantasy series]

9. "what makes a character memorable" [from a blogpost]

8. "Facebook girl picture on billboard" [from a blog post on Issues In Internet Law]

7. "layabout bunch of wankers"  [from a blog post on “EastEnders”]

6. "blood red roses"  [One of my eStoryBooks is “The Blood Rose”]

5. "girl lost childhood bear" [sounds like this came from Scooter Libby’s novel]

4. "ripping off fig leaf" [from a post on censorship, alluding to Michelangelo’s David statue]

3. "Dark Shadows Vista Theatre" [from a post about the movie premiere]

2. "Carolyn touches herself and makes noises like a kitten" [from the Dark Shadows movie review post]

1. "werewolf rape"

"Be afraid," my keyboard typed to me. "Be very afraid." The number one, all-time, most searched phrase among my blog readers was "werewolf rape". This is scary. I'm not sure if the term suggests the werewolf is the perpetrator or the victim; frankly, I don’t know which is worse to imagine. I don’t even think it’s possible (then again, if porcupines can mate, I suppose sharp claws and bestial fury might not be such an obstacle). Nonetheless, while I have written stories about many things, including werewolves and, separately, rape, I have never written a story involving both. But it’s good to know if I ever do, I have a ready audience here searching for it. 

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